40,000 signatures why won't they make another one?

Well I was hoping I could welcome you all back to this blog with an exciting story of how I met Mr Biffo (for all those who don't know he is this bloke who pretty much shaped my comedy outlook. He wrote a set of videogames pages on Teletext that I read everyday for 5 years during my "idiotic" teenagehood). He is a personal hero of mine and one day I will write an entry on here on why he is brilliant. Anyway instead of hanging out with him at a signing of his new book Confessions of a Chatroom Freak I was stuffing envelopes in a factory/warehouse type place. I won't tell you how many I did because it'll just make me sound petty - but believe me it was a fair few.

So while I was doing that one of my good chums set up a Facebook group to celebrate the beauty and all round goodness of Ellie the hot female presenter of Newsround. If you have a Facebook account I suggest you add it as one of your groups. I suggest this not just because Ellie explains the news in a simple but eloquent manner but because she deserves to be recognised as a master crafts woman. A woman whose job it is explain to children that people are dying in conflicts all around the world and to this end she does a very good job. So go search (on Facebook) Ellie Crisell (the fit one from Newsround) Appreciation Society to get involved in the cult.

If you look to the right of my posts you'll see a list of links of websites I read. Now one of them ickle computer people has suggested that a really cool new craze to start would be blog cards. The idea would be that every blog would feature a blog card that could then be saved as and collected. (Yes I am aware there would be millions). Now as I have come from the collection generation (Pogs, Go gos and Pannini sticker collections) I thought this was a bandwagon I wanted to be part of. Hence why sitting on the right hand side is a big "Blog Card".



The face of my blog card is Ryo Hazuki probably the greatest fictional character of the past 10 years, he appeared in both Shenmue games on the Dreamcast. I could go on about the importance of the character and what relevance he bears to our society and how infact he is actually a post ironic metaphor of our 21st century lifestyles, but here is what you need to know:

1)The game Shenmue cost millions and was the final nail in Sega's massive bloated coffin.
2)Once Ryo went "Looking for some sailors", he then beat the crap out of them in a bar fight.
3)He has a mysterious plaster on his face.
4)In his wardrobe are 10 sets of identical clothes and shoes.
5)What the hell was actually going on in Shenmue is a giant Xfiles esq mystery, and somewhat like the Xfiles there will probably never be a satsfactory conclusion.
This is also the reason why there is a 43,784 signature petition to make Shenmue 3 kicking round the internet.

To be honest Ryo Hazuki and Shenmue represent this blog really well. A massively ridiculous self indulgent mess that to the casual observer looks like it doesn't know where it's going and doesn't really make any logical sense, but in spite of these flaws 40,000 people want a sequel to be made - oh no wait that doesn't work as a clever comparision.

The summer starts here

So the lack of regular updates recently would suggest that the summer has started.
This doesn't however mean I've run out of things to talk about (that'll kick in about July) it instead means I've been too busy to sit down and write something.

Anyway I'm going away for a couple of days so instead of writing a load of blog updates over a series of days I will instead just dove tail a load of crap together in a quick and meaningless chunk of information for you to digest.

This is the 2nd trailer for the Transformers movie (27th July UK).


I think this movie looks absolutely amazing and more importantly they had the Transforming sound (listen to when Optimus Prime transforms) from the 80s movie. As far as I'm concerned the only way this could possibly be messed up is if the pacing was Star wars episode 2 style (leave all the action to the last half an hour and feature an embarrassing chicken run style sequence (that bit in the robot factory)). Dialogue is a complete irrelevance with this kind of movie too so theoretically (and I'm really hoping here) Michael Bay should have knocked out a really fun ridiculous movie with lots of spectacular destruction and no Armageddon style failings (oh and of course no Ben Affleck).

I WARN YOU from here on in this article is muchly sinking into the realms of videogames so if you are adverse to such things you may want to leave the rest of this article.


Still here?

Good I'll carry on then. Today I was reading in Edge about Sonic Xtreme which was going to be a 3D esq Sonic game on the Saturn, then while surfing the net (reading something completely unrelated) I came across some videos of it (in its early stages).





Then I went and found this a 3D section of Sonic Jam on the Saturn (a compilation of old Mega Drive Sonic games with a 3D world map section to swap between games).



Now my point is how come these ancient 3D Sonic games all have a working 3D camera and the new games are all feature a very broken buggy mess of a camera system. Also I hate the way the new games are set in the real world - what's wrong with patchwork brown and orange escapism?

Finally on a completely unrelated non-Sonic note if the Big Brother house this year had started full of men instead of women would the men have taken the bath out the living room and instead re plumbed it in the bathroom? Then put the fridge back in the kitchen? All in the same night of course. And then by the end of the week added a loft and balcony to the house?

That's nothing against women I'm just saying that in all likely hood the men going in would know a trade and have brought power tools as their luxury items.