Yesterday on Teletext I read that a Pelican ate a pigeon.
Then later on the news I saw the footage of the Pelican eating the pigeon (this supposedly freak occurence happened in St James' Park in London).
Anyway now I present to you some footage of the pelican swallowing the pigeon.
I don't mean to be a "negative nancy" but I think this might be the start of the end of days - having watched Ghostbusters recently I can safely say this would be the type of thing that could be a sign of the Apocalypse.
Friday, October 27, 2006
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
5 Disney movies that make me cry
God damn it has taken me an absolute age (11 days ish) to formulate my answer to the question I set myself (What are the 5 worst Disney films?).
Basically it was a stupid question to ask and thus I'm never asking myself anything again (excluding What would I like to eat? Or what's zero/zero).
Well as stupid as the question is I will attempt to answer it and explain why it took me ages to find the answer.
So without further ado - Worst 5 Disney Films.
Actually no, I'll announce them in a bit. I'll explain myself first, the reason it took me so long to decide on the worst 5 Disney movies is due to the scientific terms of "Disney's shit period(s)" or "The Madness of Disney".
Disney started off by making some excellent movies (Snow white not so much - but it was only the first one so doesn't count) then seemingly went mad between the 60s and 80s making appalling films concentrating and obsessing on anthropomorphism. Then they produced superb films in the 90s (this period ended with Mulan) then caught the madness again and this period has seemingly not ended.
I'll point out now this is a bit of a generalisation there are exceptions - (The Black Cauldron in the 80s was good and Pocahontas in the 90s was really poor).
So in conclusion it took me a while to get 5 truly bad Disney films because a lot of their movies are either bad or indifferent.
Anyway now without further, further ado - Worst 5 Disney films
5. The Aristocats
Set in France a mad old woman plans to leave all her family money to her cats instead of the butler who has lovingly cared for her all these years. The butler is understandably pissed off and tries to abandon the cats on a farm. They come back, and end up posting the butler in a box to Africa. What's so bad about this film? I'll tell you - Human cruelty (butler posted), anthropomorphism, a weird party with animals and swing music at the end and a moral that says "no matter how hard you work, the aristocracy (in any form) will steal your hard earned money". Also the animation is rubbish.
4. Basil the Great Mouse Detective
"I know let's make a film about Sherlock Holmes but instead, right, get this, instead of a man he's a mouse and he has to fight Ratigan the World's biggest rat." Wrong, wrong, wrong no more anthropomorphism and no shitty detective stories with mice. Have you learned nothing from the Rescuers? (1977) (The Rescuers isn't in here based entirely on the fact the "bad guy" Madame Medusa says "Bottles" in a really funny voice). In defense to Disney it's based on a book (not Sherlock Holmes - idiot) so it's not entirely their fault. And apparently it has a large fanbase so I'm in the minority but I still preach to you that the Black Cauldron (year before this) is the better movie. So as far as I'm concerned this is almost the pinnacle of the Disney decline in the 80s but it's not because of:
3. Oliver and Company
This is the Everest of Disney being terrible in the 80s. It's Oliver Twist with Oliver as a Cat and Fagin as a hobo and his gang as dogs. It's absolute crap (dreadful characters, more awful anthropomorphism and it bad mouths 80s business men - yuppies were funny). It's made worse by the fact that when I was a kid we had a video with the trailer for the cinema release on it. I waited years to see it then we finally got it on video and it was so awful. Oliver and Company was a bitter pill from Disney that stole my youth and started me on this dark path of writing blogs.
2. Bambi
I don't feel I need to really go into detail of why this film is so bad. Disney sanitised a perfectly fine dark story and made it all cutesy with more damn anthropomorphism (you are allowed to animate animals in silence - look at Fantasia no words just the orchestra). If you're going to change your source material so much don't use the name of the book call it "Tragic the deer and the forest of forever."
1. The Fox and The Hound
"Two friends who didn't know they were supposed to be enemies" is how the tagline read. "A studio that didn't know it used to make excellent family films" would probably be a more accurate description. This film is so by the numbers the plot was probably knocked up on a post it note. Now I'm not saying that Disney films have the most developed plots of all but they usually contain something that makes them special, that's why they are loved so much. But his doesn't contain anything of the sort, it's an inferior production that's just so pff. Nothing really happens that's worth mentioning but there is an evil bear in it (you can tell he's evil he has red eyes).
Basically it was a stupid question to ask and thus I'm never asking myself anything again (excluding What would I like to eat? Or what's zero/zero).
Well as stupid as the question is I will attempt to answer it and explain why it took me ages to find the answer.
So without further ado - Worst 5 Disney Films.
Actually no, I'll announce them in a bit. I'll explain myself first, the reason it took me so long to decide on the worst 5 Disney movies is due to the scientific terms of "Disney's shit period(s)" or "The Madness of Disney".
Disney started off by making some excellent movies (Snow white not so much - but it was only the first one so doesn't count) then seemingly went mad between the 60s and 80s making appalling films concentrating and obsessing on anthropomorphism. Then they produced superb films in the 90s (this period ended with Mulan) then caught the madness again and this period has seemingly not ended.
I'll point out now this is a bit of a generalisation there are exceptions - (The Black Cauldron in the 80s was good and Pocahontas in the 90s was really poor).
So in conclusion it took me a while to get 5 truly bad Disney films because a lot of their movies are either bad or indifferent.
Anyway now without further, further ado - Worst 5 Disney films
5. The Aristocats
Set in France a mad old woman plans to leave all her family money to her cats instead of the butler who has lovingly cared for her all these years. The butler is understandably pissed off and tries to abandon the cats on a farm. They come back, and end up posting the butler in a box to Africa. What's so bad about this film? I'll tell you - Human cruelty (butler posted), anthropomorphism, a weird party with animals and swing music at the end and a moral that says "no matter how hard you work, the aristocracy (in any form) will steal your hard earned money". Also the animation is rubbish.
4. Basil the Great Mouse Detective
"I know let's make a film about Sherlock Holmes but instead, right, get this, instead of a man he's a mouse and he has to fight Ratigan the World's biggest rat." Wrong, wrong, wrong no more anthropomorphism and no shitty detective stories with mice. Have you learned nothing from the Rescuers? (1977) (The Rescuers isn't in here based entirely on the fact the "bad guy" Madame Medusa says "Bottles" in a really funny voice). In defense to Disney it's based on a book (not Sherlock Holmes - idiot) so it's not entirely their fault. And apparently it has a large fanbase so I'm in the minority but I still preach to you that the Black Cauldron (year before this) is the better movie. So as far as I'm concerned this is almost the pinnacle of the Disney decline in the 80s but it's not because of:
3. Oliver and Company
This is the Everest of Disney being terrible in the 80s. It's Oliver Twist with Oliver as a Cat and Fagin as a hobo and his gang as dogs. It's absolute crap (dreadful characters, more awful anthropomorphism and it bad mouths 80s business men - yuppies were funny). It's made worse by the fact that when I was a kid we had a video with the trailer for the cinema release on it. I waited years to see it then we finally got it on video and it was so awful. Oliver and Company was a bitter pill from Disney that stole my youth and started me on this dark path of writing blogs.
2. Bambi
I don't feel I need to really go into detail of why this film is so bad. Disney sanitised a perfectly fine dark story and made it all cutesy with more damn anthropomorphism (you are allowed to animate animals in silence - look at Fantasia no words just the orchestra). If you're going to change your source material so much don't use the name of the book call it "Tragic the deer and the forest of forever."
1. The Fox and The Hound
"Two friends who didn't know they were supposed to be enemies" is how the tagline read. "A studio that didn't know it used to make excellent family films" would probably be a more accurate description. This film is so by the numbers the plot was probably knocked up on a post it note. Now I'm not saying that Disney films have the most developed plots of all but they usually contain something that makes them special, that's why they are loved so much. But his doesn't contain anything of the sort, it's an inferior production that's just so pff. Nothing really happens that's worth mentioning but there is an evil bear in it (you can tell he's evil he has red eyes).
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Disney the man and machine
Hello there, gosh you're looking swell! I haven't seen you look that well in ages. So what's going on with you? Nothing? Do you want to know what I've been up to? You don't? And you think the only reason I'm being this nice to you is because I want to boast about something? Well that's bloody typical! I haven't seen you in time and you start acting like a complete prick on the first chance meeting we have in this season of Autumn. No don't apologise the damage is done. I'm seriously hurt.... ah I'm only joking don't worry about it, I have tougher skin than that you know. But could you please listen to what I was going to say I was hoping you would find it interesting....
The other day (on a complete whim) I looked up Walt Disney on wikipedia. There were two reasons for this, 1st I heard that when he died his head was frozen in cryostasis. 2nd I heard he was a big rascist. Well basically I was intrigued to see if this was true. Well what I found out was that nope neither of those things are true - he was cremated (yes even his head) and there was no mention of rascism so I assume that's just an urban legend.
There were a couple of other things in the article I found interesting (namely Snow white was known as Disney's folly because it was so expensive everyone thought it would bankrupt the Disney studio and Disney pumped out a load of propaganda films for WWII because they were conscripted to do so by the American army. ( Well I found that interesting even if you don't)). The point is I've realised that I've seen a lot of Disney movies in my lifetime and I've decided to give my list of the 5 best Disney movies and the 5 worst. The difference here is that instead of the obvious ones (ie Aladdin, Little Mermaid) I'm going for the slightly weird ones.
5 Best Disney Movies
5.Tron
The plot is a little complex but basically this dude gets sucked into a computer where programs are real life people and computer users (outside the computer) are given a role of God. It was the 1st ever film with computer generated graphics and it served to be my revision for an Electronics exam. Sure it's cheesy and dated but the plot is actually really neat when you work your way through the "tricky" metaphor. Either that or I like the idea of tiny people worshiping me inside of my computer.
4.The Black Cauldron
I always felt the Wizard of Oz film sucked it had lost the darker overtones of the book and Over the rainbow is a painfully dated song that just reminds me the general public are idiots. This film was a Disney sequel (from the 80s) that was a lot darker then the original and to be honest it was a little bit mad (talking chicken and a woman who takes her head off anyone?). Dorothy Gale is depressed and keeps talking about Oz, so naturally her Aunt thinks she is a bit mental. She takes her to a local crazy doctor who plans to do tests involving hi- tech (it's the end of the 19th century) machines on Dorothy to find what's wrong with her. Dorothy stays in the hospital overnight - there's a storm and she ends up back in Oz. The Scarecrow isn't king, infact he's frozen as a statue and so are the Tinman and Lion. Basically Oz is a mess. So Dorothy has to find out what's gone on and put it right... trust me it's awesome. Also the film doesn't end with a shitty line like "and Scarecrow I'll miss you most of all." I always thought that was really harsh on the Lion and Tinman they must have really hated that Scarecrow for getting all the attention and he was made king of Oz - the git.
So that's my top 5, I'll do the bottom 5 later when I'm ready. I'm sure it'll be worth the wait.
The other day (on a complete whim) I looked up Walt Disney on wikipedia. There were two reasons for this, 1st I heard that when he died his head was frozen in cryostasis. 2nd I heard he was a big rascist. Well basically I was intrigued to see if this was true. Well what I found out was that nope neither of those things are true - he was cremated (yes even his head) and there was no mention of rascism so I assume that's just an urban legend.
There were a couple of other things in the article I found interesting (namely Snow white was known as Disney's folly because it was so expensive everyone thought it would bankrupt the Disney studio and Disney pumped out a load of propaganda films for WWII because they were conscripted to do so by the American army. ( Well I found that interesting even if you don't)). The point is I've realised that I've seen a lot of Disney movies in my lifetime and I've decided to give my list of the 5 best Disney movies and the 5 worst. The difference here is that instead of the obvious ones (ie Aladdin, Little Mermaid) I'm going for the slightly weird ones.
5 Best Disney Movies
5.Tron
The plot is a little complex but basically this dude gets sucked into a computer where programs are real life people and computer users (outside the computer) are given a role of God. It was the 1st ever film with computer generated graphics and it served to be my revision for an Electronics exam. Sure it's cheesy and dated but the plot is actually really neat when you work your way through the "tricky" metaphor. Either that or I like the idea of tiny people worshiping me inside of my computer.
4.The Black Cauldron
Made during Disney's shit period (more on that in the worst film section). It's a Disney cartoon based on a book and aimed at the Teenage fantasy market. There were no songs and the whole film has a darker overtone than usual. Also the bad guy (the Horned king) looked like the physical representation of death. Story wise this kid Taran ends up leaving his life as an assistant pig keeper to help a princess, a bard and some really annoying creature rescue an oracular pig captured by the Horned king. Taran goes on a quest to get a magic sword and sort out this black cauldron business (the Oracular pig was needed to find said cauldron).
3.Muppet Treasure Island
This film was technically made by Jim Henson's company but nevermind I still count it as a Disney film. It's a simple formula really Muppet's + songs + pirates = absurd edutainment. Also in it's favour it had Tim Curry as Long John Silver and Jim Hawkins was the comedian who played George Michael the other day in star stories (I'll write something about that soon). I'm not going to go over the plot of this as it's Treasure Island with Muppets. (If you really want a plot descrition go read the blurb of Treasure island off the back of the book in a Waterstone's then imagine it with Muppets).
2.The Reluctant Dragon
The actual cartoon's alright but the real reasons this is up here is because at home I had this version where this guy takes the book of the Reluctant Dragon to be made into a film. He then spends the next hour wandering round the Disney studio seeing how the animation is done and watching people record voices and also watching other animated shorts. It's like a making of within the film and it's great (well it was great, my youngest sister broke the tape and I remind her of it everytime I see her).
1.Return to Oz
I always felt the Wizard of Oz film sucked it had lost the darker overtones of the book and Over the rainbow is a painfully dated song that just reminds me the general public are idiots. This film was a Disney sequel (from the 80s) that was a lot darker then the original and to be honest it was a little bit mad (talking chicken and a woman who takes her head off anyone?). Dorothy Gale is depressed and keeps talking about Oz, so naturally her Aunt thinks she is a bit mental. She takes her to a local crazy doctor who plans to do tests involving hi- tech (it's the end of the 19th century) machines on Dorothy to find what's wrong with her. Dorothy stays in the hospital overnight - there's a storm and she ends up back in Oz. The Scarecrow isn't king, infact he's frozen as a statue and so are the Tinman and Lion. Basically Oz is a mess. So Dorothy has to find out what's gone on and put it right... trust me it's awesome. Also the film doesn't end with a shitty line like "and Scarecrow I'll miss you most of all." I always thought that was really harsh on the Lion and Tinman they must have really hated that Scarecrow for getting all the attention and he was made king of Oz - the git.
So that's my top 5, I'll do the bottom 5 later when I'm ready. I'm sure it'll be worth the wait.
Friday, September 29, 2006
They've just tried to remake Grease
Ok hands up if you've heard of High School Musical.
Well for all those who haven't I'll tell you about it.
A straight to TV movie made by the Disney channel it follows the exploits of the new girl at school and the captain of the basketball team auditioning for the leads in a musical at said High school.
In the States it's a massive thing with it scoring 9 singles in the top ten or twenty or something like that.
Basically I saw it this evening and it's a bit good. I mean it must be good containing lines such as:
Chad Danforth "You can't be in the muscial Troy your the basketball captain not a singer".
Troy Bolton "Dammit can't I be both?"
See amusing and dramatic and it's like that the whole way through. Infact it's almost as dramatic as the Top Gun 2 script I've got ideas for - one of these days.
Anyway here's a list of why it's good.
A) The beginning is a complete rip off of Grease.
B) The whole movie is quite a rip off of Grease.
C) They never actually make a musical (it's about the auditions).
D) The male lead (character name - Troy Bolton) looks like Mark Hamill
E) It is filled with Neighbours style acting (ie overly dramatic)
F) The director is listed as a Director/Choreographer - so he must know what he's doing.
Here is why it's bad
1) No big screen kiss at the end - all musicals should end with one it's tradition.
2) Post credits there is a really odd coda.
Well here is the end sequence.
Hopefully after seeing this you'll want to see the entire thing (it's being shown on the BBC over Christmas). Oh and this routine looks like it's stolen off of the opening of Bring it on.
Update: That last video has been removed from youtube by someone (probably Disney - though it is television so it should techinically be in the public domain). Anyway watch this fan made thing it is brilliant.
Well for all those who haven't I'll tell you about it.
A straight to TV movie made by the Disney channel it follows the exploits of the new girl at school and the captain of the basketball team auditioning for the leads in a musical at said High school.
In the States it's a massive thing with it scoring 9 singles in the top ten or twenty or something like that.
Basically I saw it this evening and it's a bit good. I mean it must be good containing lines such as:
Chad Danforth "You can't be in the muscial Troy your the basketball captain not a singer".
Troy Bolton "Dammit can't I be both?"
See amusing and dramatic and it's like that the whole way through. Infact it's almost as dramatic as the Top Gun 2 script I've got ideas for - one of these days.
Anyway here's a list of why it's good.
A) The beginning is a complete rip off of Grease.
B) The whole movie is quite a rip off of Grease.
C) They never actually make a musical (it's about the auditions).
D) The male lead (character name - Troy Bolton) looks like Mark Hamill
E) It is filled with Neighbours style acting (ie overly dramatic)
F) The director is listed as a Director/Choreographer - so he must know what he's doing.
Here is why it's bad
1) No big screen kiss at the end - all musicals should end with one it's tradition.
2) Post credits there is a really odd coda.
Well here is the end sequence.
Hopefully after seeing this you'll want to see the entire thing (it's being shown on the BBC over Christmas). Oh and this routine looks like it's stolen off of the opening of Bring it on.
Update: That last video has been removed from youtube by someone (probably Disney - though it is television so it should techinically be in the public domain). Anyway watch this fan made thing it is brilliant.
Monday, September 25, 2006
A real update - not one of those fake ones I've been doing
Recently on this blog I've been getting away with just adding videos and not really putting in content. The reason for this is A) I've been feeling lazy and B) there has been nothing to really write about. You don't really want second rate ramblings do you? No I thought not.
So today I've tried to rectify this by adding videos but putting in my own written content to link the two together.
Anyway Girls Aloud are great!
They seem to be a proper genuine pop phenomenon the kind that just doesn't seem to be about anymore. Most pop acts these days seem to be either serious vocal acts (the Sugar Babes), shitty pop punk esq bands (Fall Out Boy (not real emo)) or Lily Allen and Sandi Thom (there's a genre there but I'm too tired to work it out, oh and by the way I do quite like Lilly Allen - she's alright). But Girls Aloud are old school generic fun pop music from girls who are nice to look at and aren't that strong vocally.
Yes, so Girls Aloud if you have noticed they are the only real survivors from the crazy world of Popstars/Pop idol and X factor. (Apart from Will Young and Myleen Klauss who for the sake of this article I'm ignoring). And although it's obvious why they are popular (I've told you back in the previous paragraph ( - they're old school) I'm going to use some videos to illustrate the other reasons they're excellent.
That's their performance of Jingle bell rock it illustrates the fact they are dead hot and sugary sweet. It's like eating lava with canderel.
That's their "live" performance of Jump on this show they did for T4 where they went and performed in people's hometowns. Needless to say the show was shite. If channel 4 want to make shows for Teenagers/Students they should employ me as I'm cheap to employ and I wouldn't make the mistakes most of these show designers do (ie using June Sarpong as a presenter). Anyway what's important here is that Girls Aloud must have a choreographer who finds it amusing to make them start and end in hilharious statue esq positions (you might not be able to view the end it may be corrupted - sorry).
That's their new single Something kinda ooh. This illustarates the fact they can't really dance or that their choreographer is a git and wants to make them look stupid.
So in conclusion Girls Aloud are superb based entirely on the fact they are manufactured, attractive and funny leading me to believe I should be dating some kind of sexually appealing clown robot.
Oh and just to answer the most important question (who is (are) my favourite(s) Girls Alouder) - Cherryl Tweedy and Nicola Roberts are the best. Tweedy because she is blatantly the hottest. Nicola I've no idea (according to one of my mates it's because my brain thinks she is the least popular one and I'd have more of a chance with her. (This may or may not be true my mind is an idiot)).
So today I've tried to rectify this by adding videos but putting in my own written content to link the two together.
Anyway Girls Aloud are great!
They seem to be a proper genuine pop phenomenon the kind that just doesn't seem to be about anymore. Most pop acts these days seem to be either serious vocal acts (the Sugar Babes), shitty pop punk esq bands (Fall Out Boy (not real emo)) or Lily Allen and Sandi Thom (there's a genre there but I'm too tired to work it out, oh and by the way I do quite like Lilly Allen - she's alright). But Girls Aloud are old school generic fun pop music from girls who are nice to look at and aren't that strong vocally.
Yes, so Girls Aloud if you have noticed they are the only real survivors from the crazy world of Popstars/Pop idol and X factor. (Apart from Will Young and Myleen Klauss who for the sake of this article I'm ignoring). And although it's obvious why they are popular (I've told you back in the previous paragraph ( - they're old school) I'm going to use some videos to illustrate the other reasons they're excellent.
That's their performance of Jingle bell rock it illustrates the fact they are dead hot and sugary sweet. It's like eating lava with canderel.
That's their "live" performance of Jump on this show they did for T4 where they went and performed in people's hometowns. Needless to say the show was shite. If channel 4 want to make shows for Teenagers/Students they should employ me as I'm cheap to employ and I wouldn't make the mistakes most of these show designers do (ie using June Sarpong as a presenter). Anyway what's important here is that Girls Aloud must have a choreographer who finds it amusing to make them start and end in hilharious statue esq positions (you might not be able to view the end it may be corrupted - sorry).
That's their new single Something kinda ooh. This illustarates the fact they can't really dance or that their choreographer is a git and wants to make them look stupid.
So in conclusion Girls Aloud are superb based entirely on the fact they are manufactured, attractive and funny leading me to believe I should be dating some kind of sexually appealing clown robot.
Oh and just to answer the most important question (who is (are) my favourite(s) Girls Alouder) - Cherryl Tweedy and Nicola Roberts are the best. Tweedy because she is blatantly the hottest. Nicola I've no idea (according to one of my mates it's because my brain thinks she is the least popular one and I'd have more of a chance with her. (This may or may not be true my mind is an idiot)).
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Cheap update 1
David Mitchell and Robert Webb are brilliant that's an actual FACT.
So their new show the Mitchell and Webb look is thus brilliant.
I figure that some people forgot to see it or haven't seen this superb duo before so I present to you some of this genius:
Well that's it for today. Come back soon for more cheap updates.
So their new show the Mitchell and Webb look is thus brilliant.
I figure that some people forgot to see it or haven't seen this superb duo before so I present to you some of this genius:
Well that's it for today. Come back soon for more cheap updates.
Friday, September 08, 2006
BTW: MTV, ATDI and RGB FYI :P (Yes I feel dirty and ashamed with that kind of title)
Several updates, in two days?
This is a sign the summer is finally over I'm actually starting to use this blog again.
Anyway apparently teenagers aren't watching the shows that are actually being made for them (that's why Top of the pops got cancelled - teenagers weren't watching it) instead they're wasting their time with Desperate Housewives.
So after hearing this I started to get a bit worried that there would be no more teenage shows (think about it no OC, no T4, no Hollyoaks). But then I realised there would always be MTV, their entire output is shows for teenagers (granted American teenagers). MTV have got loads of money so there is no way they'll go bankrupt and they'll never change so they will make shows for teenagers for as long as western society survives.
Well anywho after thinking MTV were great I decided to watch more of their shows. And that's when I finally realised that pretty much the majority of their output is actually diabolical. I could write the whole list of dreadful dreadful shows they make but the highlight for me is a show called MADE.
Basically horrible loser teenagers try and achieve something that they just weren't meant to do: The social outcast nerd (with no balance and a complex about her looks) tries to become the cheerleader, the non cheerleader tries to become the homecoming Queen and they had a girl become an American football player (just to clarify I've no problem with girls playing American football but she was playing against guys which I'm sure is not legally allowed). Anyway bottom line is it's retarded but funny. I couldn't find any footage of MADE but I found this spoof which like all good spoofs is damn close to the original.
Bizarrely the soundtrack to the real Made features repeated use of 10 second exerts of different songs one of which was Invalid Litter Dept by At the Drive In which I have to say is one of the greatest songs EVER from one of the best albums EVER.
Here is some ATDI footage off French TV. A live performance of One armed Scissor followed by Invalid Litter Dept.
And yes the sound is a little off but it's all about the performance.
And finally something completely un MTV related. I found this footage of The Real Ghostbusters edited together with some German song.
I just thought it was neat.
This is a sign the summer is finally over I'm actually starting to use this blog again.
Anyway apparently teenagers aren't watching the shows that are actually being made for them (that's why Top of the pops got cancelled - teenagers weren't watching it) instead they're wasting their time with Desperate Housewives.
So after hearing this I started to get a bit worried that there would be no more teenage shows (think about it no OC, no T4, no Hollyoaks). But then I realised there would always be MTV, their entire output is shows for teenagers (granted American teenagers). MTV have got loads of money so there is no way they'll go bankrupt and they'll never change so they will make shows for teenagers for as long as western society survives.
Well anywho after thinking MTV were great I decided to watch more of their shows. And that's when I finally realised that pretty much the majority of their output is actually diabolical. I could write the whole list of dreadful dreadful shows they make but the highlight for me is a show called MADE.
Basically horrible loser teenagers try and achieve something that they just weren't meant to do: The social outcast nerd (with no balance and a complex about her looks) tries to become the cheerleader, the non cheerleader tries to become the homecoming Queen and they had a girl become an American football player (just to clarify I've no problem with girls playing American football but she was playing against guys which I'm sure is not legally allowed). Anyway bottom line is it's retarded but funny. I couldn't find any footage of MADE but I found this spoof which like all good spoofs is damn close to the original.
Bizarrely the soundtrack to the real Made features repeated use of 10 second exerts of different songs one of which was Invalid Litter Dept by At the Drive In which I have to say is one of the greatest songs EVER from one of the best albums EVER.
Here is some ATDI footage off French TV. A live performance of One armed Scissor followed by Invalid Litter Dept.
And yes the sound is a little off but it's all about the performance.
And finally something completely un MTV related. I found this footage of The Real Ghostbusters edited together with some German song.
I just thought it was neat.
It's official the internet is the scariest place ever
OK sorry another update is needed.
Just as I was logging off I got contacted by one of my chums who runs a clothing line for mountain biking and such. (Rythumandflow.co.uk)
He just found this video on youtube.com
Disclaimer: This video is not for squeemish people it's a bit nasty.
Anyway we have no idea who this guy is he's not sponsored by rythumandflow.co.uk and we have no idea why he found that necessary.
The internet can be a weird weird place.
Update: Found out how this all came about. That guy knew a friend of a friend and heard about rythumandflow.co.uk and chucked it in when he decided to do that. (Still don't understand why that was necessary). Anyway just for a moment that was really rather freaky.
(And yeah even though the mystery was solved I'll keep this update simply because it's the only legitimate not encouraging violence kind of way to include a video like that. This also provides an excellent way to shoehorn in rythumandflow.co.uk (just like The Sun does, making an advert look like an article).
Just as I was logging off I got contacted by one of my chums who runs a clothing line for mountain biking and such. (Rythumandflow.co.uk)
He just found this video on youtube.com
Disclaimer: This video is not for squeemish people it's a bit nasty.
Anyway we have no idea who this guy is he's not sponsored by rythumandflow.co.uk and we have no idea why he found that necessary.
The internet can be a weird weird place.
Update: Found out how this all came about. That guy knew a friend of a friend and heard about rythumandflow.co.uk and chucked it in when he decided to do that. (Still don't understand why that was necessary). Anyway just for a moment that was really rather freaky.
(And yeah even though the mystery was solved I'll keep this update simply because it's the only legitimate not encouraging violence kind of way to include a video like that. This also provides an excellent way to shoehorn in rythumandflow.co.uk (just like The Sun does, making an advert look like an article).
Transformers a religious symbol in disguise
Yet again I'm doing a "dual" update because I'm feeling wordy today.
I recently bought the Transformers movie on DVD for the bargain price of £5 and it was worth every one of those 500 pennies (or 1000 half pennies). It's a really funny film with amusing dialogue and an amazing soundtrack. It's filled with 80s power rock tunes and when combined with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles soundtrack of "white" hip hop provides a musical overview of the late 80s / early 90s. Also just worth a mention one of the tracks on Tranformers: the movie is provided by Weird Al Yankovic, so does that mean it's ironic? I just don't know.
Anyway after watching the film I went on to reading up on Tranformers via wikipedia just to see how many seasons there were how long it ran for - that kind of stuff. It was after I scrolled the page to the bottom that my head metaphorically exploded. The Transformers universe is absolutley massive there's so many spin offs and back stories I was at a complete loss.
And people say kids don't learn anything from TV.
Also worth a mention Tranformers: the movie was Orson Welles last film (he died in the middle of recording his voice for it) which also proves the angel of death has a sense of humour.
So weeks later I show Transformers to one of my good chums. He points at the TV and shouts (in the Optimus Prime Vs Megatron sequence (2:40 on this video)).
"Look he's shot in the side, you know what that is? It's a Christ reference!"
Just to explain Christ was pierced in his side by the lance of Longinus. So now any side wound equals a Christ reference.
Well anyway I thought back to my Ten commandments - thou shalt worship no false idols (well thats the modern take on it).
And thought yeah, maybe we have made Optimus Prime a false Idol he's a robot and a truck.
A man and machine.
Think about it...
(For all of you who are confused I'm being profound).
I recently bought the Transformers movie on DVD for the bargain price of £5 and it was worth every one of those 500 pennies (or 1000 half pennies). It's a really funny film with amusing dialogue and an amazing soundtrack. It's filled with 80s power rock tunes and when combined with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles soundtrack of "white" hip hop provides a musical overview of the late 80s / early 90s. Also just worth a mention one of the tracks on Tranformers: the movie is provided by Weird Al Yankovic, so does that mean it's ironic? I just don't know.
Anyway after watching the film I went on to reading up on Tranformers via wikipedia just to see how many seasons there were how long it ran for - that kind of stuff. It was after I scrolled the page to the bottom that my head metaphorically exploded. The Transformers universe is absolutley massive there's so many spin offs and back stories I was at a complete loss.
And people say kids don't learn anything from TV.
Also worth a mention Tranformers: the movie was Orson Welles last film (he died in the middle of recording his voice for it) which also proves the angel of death has a sense of humour.
So weeks later I show Transformers to one of my good chums. He points at the TV and shouts (in the Optimus Prime Vs Megatron sequence (2:40 on this video)).
"Look he's shot in the side, you know what that is? It's a Christ reference!"
Just to explain Christ was pierced in his side by the lance of Longinus. So now any side wound equals a Christ reference.
Well anyway I thought back to my Ten commandments - thou shalt worship no false idols (well thats the modern take on it).
And thought yeah, maybe we have made Optimus Prime a false Idol he's a robot and a truck.
A man and machine.
Think about it...
(For all of you who are confused I'm being profound).
You Know this song deserves to be no.1
I don't know how many of you have noticed but a lot of my updates have actually been completely ripped off of Popjustice.com
And today is no exception...
Earlier on at the beginning of June I was championing this song as my "official" song of the summer. But then it disappeared, without a trace.
But now it has re-appeared and this time with a video!
SO watch this:
The band are called Superjupiter and they are Norwegian.
You know (that's the single's name) is out on October 23rd
I hope this single goes to No.1
And I demand all the Djs I know (all of one) to play this song in their sets.
(Interestingly I did used to know more Djs but I haven't seen them in ages).
(Also interestingly when I previously said interestingly I meant boringly).
And today is no exception...
Earlier on at the beginning of June I was championing this song as my "official" song of the summer. But then it disappeared, without a trace.
But now it has re-appeared and this time with a video!
SO watch this:
The band are called Superjupiter and they are Norwegian.
You know (that's the single's name) is out on October 23rd
I hope this single goes to No.1
And I demand all the Djs I know (all of one) to play this song in their sets.
(Interestingly I did used to know more Djs but I haven't seen them in ages).
(Also interestingly when I previously said interestingly I meant boringly).
Friday, September 01, 2006
The Mint
As I haven't done many updates this month I figured I'd go "a little bit crazy" and do two in a row. So here is the second.
I'm currently watching the Mint which is a really rather shite gameshow on ITV which starts at late o'clock and ends at stupid o'clock. I'm not going to go into the details of the show because trust me you really won't care. I'm here to talk about the one highlight of the entire show...
Cat Porter...
In these lonely early mornings of the summer I find myself wanting to have dinner conversation (not a eupherism) with Cat Porter. She makes the mint watchable and these are the reasons why she's great.
1. She wears evening dresses.
2. She has a nice accent.
3. She lives in Tunbridgewells (which is not that far from me)
4. She was an extra in James Bond - Die another day (to be honest that's just a fact not really a reason to like her).
5. She tells the worst anecdotes ever (that's endearing).
6. She has a degree from Kings College in biological sciences (and I wouldn't mind lighting her bunsen burner (and that is a eupherism) although in all honesty not a very good one more of a chemistry one than a biology one)).
I'm currently watching the Mint which is a really rather shite gameshow on ITV which starts at late o'clock and ends at stupid o'clock. I'm not going to go into the details of the show because trust me you really won't care. I'm here to talk about the one highlight of the entire show...
Cat Porter...
In these lonely early mornings of the summer I find myself wanting to have dinner conversation (not a eupherism) with Cat Porter. She makes the mint watchable and these are the reasons why she's great.
1. She wears evening dresses.
2. She has a nice accent.
3. She lives in Tunbridgewells (which is not that far from me)
4. She was an extra in James Bond - Die another day (to be honest that's just a fact not really a reason to like her).
5. She tells the worst anecdotes ever (that's endearing).
6. She has a degree from Kings College in biological sciences (and I wouldn't mind lighting her bunsen burner (and that is a eupherism) although in all honesty not a very good one more of a chemistry one than a biology one)).
French people don't wear converse
I've been away for a week in France - it was an adventure as I travelled there on the Eurostar which has reduced check in times when compared with flying.
However it also has a band playing whenever the train to Disneyland Paris departs. Seeing men in Lederhosen with tubas and banjos playing "It's a small world after all" at 8am is just not cool and liable to give you a headache. (Also Lederhosen are obviously German not French so I didn't quite get why they were dressed like that - maybe they just liked it?)
So anyway as the title suggests I didn't see a single person in France wearing a pair of Converse. I found that rather strange. ( It's stranger still as one of my mates tells me all the French people he knows wear Converse. (Just to clarify, it probably seems a bit odd that I'm going on about Converse but they are just such cool shoes and I keep seeing them all over the place .... even when I close my eyes. Ha ha again I joke when I close my eyes I see Nikes and those hideous images of Cream the rabbit)).
So back to talking about my trip. While I was there I was eating dinner when my Grandmother suddenly says to me; (by the way my Grandmother was there at dinner with me she didn't just start talking to me from "beyond the grave" or anything). "Do you ever say or do supid things?" And I say (because I'm feeling honest) "Yes actually I do all the time." To which she replies "I was just wondering because on one side of our family there is a real streak of doing and saying stupid things. Your father does stupid things, your uncles do stupid things and your father's cousins do stupid things. Infact when I was at a family reunion I spoke to a relative of ours who was telling me their son says and does stupid things all the time - so it definitely runs in our family".
My reaction to this was not one of dismay but of acceptance. The next time I look back on doing something and think "that was really stupid" I won't get embarrassed I'll just shrug my shoulders and think "well I was always going to do something stupid it is inherently in my nature" - you see it's brilliant I can blame everything on genetics, explain to everyone my stupidity is due to genetics and never have to accept responsibility for some of my behaviour. Now if I can just find that my family is genetically inclined to being Pretentious, Depressing, Complaining, Hypercondriact, Emotionally Hypersensitive, Perverts I'll be sorted.
However it also has a band playing whenever the train to Disneyland Paris departs. Seeing men in Lederhosen with tubas and banjos playing "It's a small world after all" at 8am is just not cool and liable to give you a headache. (Also Lederhosen are obviously German not French so I didn't quite get why they were dressed like that - maybe they just liked it?)
So anyway as the title suggests I didn't see a single person in France wearing a pair of Converse. I found that rather strange. ( It's stranger still as one of my mates tells me all the French people he knows wear Converse. (Just to clarify, it probably seems a bit odd that I'm going on about Converse but they are just such cool shoes and I keep seeing them all over the place .... even when I close my eyes. Ha ha again I joke when I close my eyes I see Nikes and those hideous images of Cream the rabbit)).
So back to talking about my trip. While I was there I was eating dinner when my Grandmother suddenly says to me; (by the way my Grandmother was there at dinner with me she didn't just start talking to me from "beyond the grave" or anything). "Do you ever say or do supid things?" And I say (because I'm feeling honest) "Yes actually I do all the time." To which she replies "I was just wondering because on one side of our family there is a real streak of doing and saying stupid things. Your father does stupid things, your uncles do stupid things and your father's cousins do stupid things. Infact when I was at a family reunion I spoke to a relative of ours who was telling me their son says and does stupid things all the time - so it definitely runs in our family".
My reaction to this was not one of dismay but of acceptance. The next time I look back on doing something and think "that was really stupid" I won't get embarrassed I'll just shrug my shoulders and think "well I was always going to do something stupid it is inherently in my nature" - you see it's brilliant I can blame everything on genetics, explain to everyone my stupidity is due to genetics and never have to accept responsibility for some of my behaviour. Now if I can just find that my family is genetically inclined to being Pretentious, Depressing, Complaining, Hypercondriact, Emotionally Hypersensitive, Perverts I'll be sorted.
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
Nothings happening, nothings happening a lot of people look pissed (off).
It's still obvious to me it's August (despite the shitty weather) because nothing interesting has happened - August is a boring month in the world of me.
Anyway a couple of important CD related dates. New Audioslave album 4th September (though I think the single is shite).
New Mars Volta album 11th September (no story this time just mad song writing and yeah I know they are an "aquired" taste).
New Sparta album 10th October (their new single Taking Back Control is on their myspace and is actually really good).
Also has anyone else seen that new police campaign for Community officers - it's awesome. There are hand drawn pictures of police officers staring off into the middle distance like heroes. It looks like the propaganda out of a fascist state or communist Russia.
Unfortuantely I don't have a picture of said propaganda because I can't seem to find one. (Unless I e-mail the police asking for it which just seemed mean as I was going to mock them over it).
So yeah keep an eye out for funny police recruitment posters.
Anyway a couple of important CD related dates. New Audioslave album 4th September (though I think the single is shite).
New Mars Volta album 11th September (no story this time just mad song writing and yeah I know they are an "aquired" taste).
New Sparta album 10th October (their new single Taking Back Control is on their myspace and is actually really good).
Also has anyone else seen that new police campaign for Community officers - it's awesome. There are hand drawn pictures of police officers staring off into the middle distance like heroes. It looks like the propaganda out of a fascist state or communist Russia.
Unfortuantely I don't have a picture of said propaganda because I can't seem to find one. (Unless I e-mail the police asking for it which just seemed mean as I was going to mock them over it).
So yeah keep an eye out for funny police recruitment posters.
Sunday, August 13, 2006
Have I been reduced to this? (Yeah, Yeah, Yeah)
Christina Aguilera's current single (Ain't No Other Man) has been harrassing me ever since its video release. I don't even like it.
Whenever I turn a music channel on it's always there waiting with its sparkly dresses, overtly sexual attitude, speakeasy drunkenness and red lips which are like some kind of sex beacon (Nelly Furtado is guilty of that too).
Anyway back to the topic, yer it just seems to be everywhere.
When I went away I was camping in a tent and yet I still managed to hear it on the campsite. And the other day I was in work and it came on the radio... except we don't have a radio at work. Someone had got it off the internet and burned it onto a CD!
Everytime I mention to anyone that this single seems to be following me I get told I'm obviously going insane as hardly anyone else has heard it - insantity is brilliant.
On the plus side in the middle of the song there's a section where Christina sings "Yeah yeah yeah" then follows it with a "No no no". I'm finding it mightily amusing to answer yes/no questions with those responses. Oh and when she wears that red jumper she looks like a blonde Jennifer Love Hewitt which is great because if you had both Christina Aguilera and Jennifer Love Hewitt you'd have light/dark twins and then you could walk around acting like Two Face from Batman Forever. (Except better than Batman Forever which was shit. (Yeah Yeah Yeah). It was no Batman Begins. (No No No)).
So in conclusion watch the video I find it annoying.
Whenever I turn a music channel on it's always there waiting with its sparkly dresses, overtly sexual attitude, speakeasy drunkenness and red lips which are like some kind of sex beacon (Nelly Furtado is guilty of that too).
Anyway back to the topic, yer it just seems to be everywhere.
When I went away I was camping in a tent and yet I still managed to hear it on the campsite. And the other day I was in work and it came on the radio... except we don't have a radio at work. Someone had got it off the internet and burned it onto a CD!
Everytime I mention to anyone that this single seems to be following me I get told I'm obviously going insane as hardly anyone else has heard it - insantity is brilliant.
On the plus side in the middle of the song there's a section where Christina sings "Yeah yeah yeah" then follows it with a "No no no". I'm finding it mightily amusing to answer yes/no questions with those responses. Oh and when she wears that red jumper she looks like a blonde Jennifer Love Hewitt which is great because if you had both Christina Aguilera and Jennifer Love Hewitt you'd have light/dark twins and then you could walk around acting like Two Face from Batman Forever. (Except better than Batman Forever which was shit. (Yeah Yeah Yeah). It was no Batman Begins. (No No No)).
So in conclusion watch the video I find it annoying.
Friday, August 11, 2006
Explaining a few things
I've been away for a few days hence the lack of updates but I think people have still been reading this blog which is good... however I feel an explanantion is due on the last two posts due to them being a little odd.
Well anyway what happened is one of my chums said my tone on here was a little negative and that I should write something positive. Infact he challenged me to write two positive posts which I did try to do. However on retrospect both Positive Post 1 and 2 sound really negative and sarcastic. And as we all know sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, but then again wit is the highest form of intelligence so fuck it. (And in all honesty I do think Wallace is a decent town and that Llamas are great).
So yes onto other things. I road tripped (via Corby) up to Edinburgh for a couple of days of the Fringe festival. I learned quite a lot on the trip which I figure I'll share with you:
Surrey and Edinburgh are roughly 7 1/2 hours away from each other which is a really long trip to do in a day.
Corby is a scary place with a history of murders and the pizza there is almost as good as Papa John's in Reigate.
Well anyway what happened is one of my chums said my tone on here was a little negative and that I should write something positive. Infact he challenged me to write two positive posts which I did try to do. However on retrospect both Positive Post 1 and 2 sound really negative and sarcastic. And as we all know sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, but then again wit is the highest form of intelligence so fuck it. (And in all honesty I do think Wallace is a decent town and that Llamas are great).
So yes onto other things. I road tripped (via Corby) up to Edinburgh for a couple of days of the Fringe festival. I learned quite a lot on the trip which I figure I'll share with you:
Surrey and Edinburgh are roughly 7 1/2 hours away from each other which is a really long trip to do in a day.
Corby is a scary place with a history of murders and the pizza there is almost as good as Papa John's in Reigate.
The Fringe festival as well as being brilliant fun is expensive, pretentious and weird (see picture above).
Either Scotland has the largest population of attractive women per square inch or it's that the Fringe encourages drama students which are the hottest type of students.
Above is an example of the kind of attractive girl available there. (I took a photo of her from the bushes....ha ha ha I'm just joking I was sitting on a bench).
The drama dept of Cambridge Uni are damn good actors but when they put on plays translated from the works of Kafka the audience has an uncomfortable and on occasion unintentionally hilharious viewing experience. Also I may have made the lighting director uncomfortable by continuously leering at her, basically she was hot and my eyes took on a mind of their own....stupid eyes.
Finally if you take a paper mache cat with you and take it out your bag people will gather round you and assume you are going to put on a play. (The cat's name is Spuffy she likes views, we found her in my room before we left and figured we'd take her for some reason).
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Positive Post 2
What's the best animal in the world?
Unless you said llama you are wrong.
(Although you get half points for the following: Platypus, Flesh eating Kangaroo, Grimace from the crazy world of McDonalds or Rush the dog from Megaman).
So anyway Llamas are great. You can ride them, they spit and Disney made a whole film about a man becoming one (Emperor's New Groove).
So I was exceedingly impressed and happy to know about Llama trekking in the Surrey Hills (which is near where I live).
What happens is you go and pay these people money, then you and a guide take the Llamas for a walk in the forest. You can't ride the llamas (you pull them on a leash) but they carry a picnic, which you stop and eat halfway through the walk. The best thing is these llama people (llama farmers?) organise all kinds of events. You can have:
A Kids birthday party
A corporate event
A winter morning trek
A summer evening trek
The luxury champagne picnic trek (they recommend this as a wedding gift)
Also you can go repeatedy as all the llamas have different personalities so if you choose a different one each time you get a whole new experience.
Doesn't everyone look happy?
That's Grimace from McDonalds. Interestingly I don't grimace when I'm eating a McDonalds it's usually afterwards when I feel lke I've eaten a bowling ball, and I always feel like this no matter how much I've eaten.
Rush is Megaman's dog he's the shit because he can fly, and has a spring which comes out his back, he's basically a dog tranformer. Which is more impressive than anything your dog can do isn't it?
Unless you said llama you are wrong.
(Although you get half points for the following: Platypus, Flesh eating Kangaroo, Grimace from the crazy world of McDonalds or Rush the dog from Megaman).
So anyway Llamas are great. You can ride them, they spit and Disney made a whole film about a man becoming one (Emperor's New Groove).
So I was exceedingly impressed and happy to know about Llama trekking in the Surrey Hills (which is near where I live).
What happens is you go and pay these people money, then you and a guide take the Llamas for a walk in the forest. You can't ride the llamas (you pull them on a leash) but they carry a picnic, which you stop and eat halfway through the walk. The best thing is these llama people (llama farmers?) organise all kinds of events. You can have:
A Kids birthday party
A corporate event
A winter morning trek
A summer evening trek
The luxury champagne picnic trek (they recommend this as a wedding gift)
Also you can go repeatedy as all the llamas have different personalities so if you choose a different one each time you get a whole new experience.
Doesn't everyone look happy?
That's Grimace from McDonalds. Interestingly I don't grimace when I'm eating a McDonalds it's usually afterwards when I feel lke I've eaten a bowling ball, and I always feel like this no matter how much I've eaten.
Rush is Megaman's dog he's the shit because he can fly, and has a spring which comes out his back, he's basically a dog tranformer. Which is more impressive than anything your dog can do isn't it?
Friday, July 28, 2006
Positive Post 1
I haven't updated in a week, which for this blog is a long time.
The reason for the delayed absence is I have been "researching" topics to write about. (When I say researching I mean reading internet articles).
Anyway pull up a chair, sit down, take your shoes off and smoke a pipe as a will tell you a story.
In the State of Idaho lies a town called Wallace. It's a pretty ordinary small town in one of the fly-over states however it houses one of the greatest claims to fame ever...
It is the centre of the universe...
Just think about that for a minute, the centre of the whole universe, how amazing is that?
And it's not just that which is great about Wallace as per usual here is a breakdown list of great facts:
1) Dante's Peak was filmed there and the local were paid extras.
2) Only 960 people live there compared to the 1 million trees in the valley.
3) Wallace is famous for its brothels (the last of which closed in 1988) now it just has brothel museums.
4) The sraight freeway connecting both sides of the USA curves round Wallace - it is that good.
5) The guy who owns the hotel calls himself the Primeminister - he started doing this on a whim.
6) In the 70s Wallace was a silver mining area which was highly polluted (obviously due to the mining). When the mines were eventually closed everything re grew so the area is evironmentally stable and beautiful.
7) The town has a by-law which allows snowmobiles to be driven on the roads round there.
So there u go Wallace is a super excellent place which has a load of random stuff going on.
The reason for the delayed absence is I have been "researching" topics to write about. (When I say researching I mean reading internet articles).
Anyway pull up a chair, sit down, take your shoes off and smoke a pipe as a will tell you a story.
In the State of Idaho lies a town called Wallace. It's a pretty ordinary small town in one of the fly-over states however it houses one of the greatest claims to fame ever...
It is the centre of the universe...
Just think about that for a minute, the centre of the whole universe, how amazing is that?
And it's not just that which is great about Wallace as per usual here is a breakdown list of great facts:
1) Dante's Peak was filmed there and the local were paid extras.
2) Only 960 people live there compared to the 1 million trees in the valley.
3) Wallace is famous for its brothels (the last of which closed in 1988) now it just has brothel museums.
4) The sraight freeway connecting both sides of the USA curves round Wallace - it is that good.
5) The guy who owns the hotel calls himself the Primeminister - he started doing this on a whim.
6) In the 70s Wallace was a silver mining area which was highly polluted (obviously due to the mining). When the mines were eventually closed everything re grew so the area is evironmentally stable and beautiful.
7) The town has a by-law which allows snowmobiles to be driven on the roads round there.
So there u go Wallace is a super excellent place which has a load of random stuff going on.
Thursday, July 20, 2006
Watch this video without question
Put your hand up if you remember Mis-Teeq.
They were some "pop band" with "Uk Garage roots" (although it was always debatable whether Uk garage was a genuine genre).
Anyway check this video, it is the new single from Alesha Dixon the MC from Mis-Teeq. (She used to put on an excellent Shaggy/Sean Paul esq voice).
Watched it? Did you understand the songs appeal?
Well here is why I like it.
1) An excellent rock guitar riff.
2) That woah woah bit is good.
3) The bridge comes out of nowhere and doesn't fit the rest of the song.
4) It's the kind of pop song the Lostprophets would cover.
5) The song finishes with the guitar on its own.
It's like a beautiful modern pop/rock hybrid and that should be saluted and encouraged.
They were some "pop band" with "Uk Garage roots" (although it was always debatable whether Uk garage was a genuine genre).
Anyway check this video, it is the new single from Alesha Dixon the MC from Mis-Teeq. (She used to put on an excellent Shaggy/Sean Paul esq voice).
Watched it? Did you understand the songs appeal?
Well here is why I like it.
1) An excellent rock guitar riff.
2) That woah woah bit is good.
3) The bridge comes out of nowhere and doesn't fit the rest of the song.
4) It's the kind of pop song the Lostprophets would cover.
5) The song finishes with the guitar on its own.
It's like a beautiful modern pop/rock hybrid and that should be saluted and encouraged.
If you have a spare 25 mins
Watch this if you have the time.
It is a short anime film called Voices of a Distant Star.
I think it won some awards somewhere or something.
Just in case you need more persuasion here is the blurb (don't know if it's the exact one off the back of the box).
"When a mysterious alien force begins their annihilation of the human race, a young pilot feels called to join the resistance. But the danger of an interstellar battle is not Mikako's greatest concern. For she has left behind the one young man she loves. And as Mikako flies further into deep space, her only way to connect with Noboru is by cell-phone text messages. While Mikako risks her life to save mankind, Noboru waits. At first days, then months, then years for each new message that will let him know whether Mikako is still alive. And while she barely grows older in the timelessness of space, Noboru ages. How can the love of two young people, torn apart by war, survive? To what distance would you go...for your one, true love?"
Oh and you may need to watch it full screen (actually on Youtube.com) as occasionally the subtitles can get blurry.
Part 1 running time 9mins 22secs
Part 2 running time 9mins 5secs
Part 3 running time 6mins 34secs
It is a short anime film called Voices of a Distant Star.
I think it won some awards somewhere or something.
Just in case you need more persuasion here is the blurb (don't know if it's the exact one off the back of the box).
"When a mysterious alien force begins their annihilation of the human race, a young pilot feels called to join the resistance. But the danger of an interstellar battle is not Mikako's greatest concern. For she has left behind the one young man she loves. And as Mikako flies further into deep space, her only way to connect with Noboru is by cell-phone text messages. While Mikako risks her life to save mankind, Noboru waits. At first days, then months, then years for each new message that will let him know whether Mikako is still alive. And while she barely grows older in the timelessness of space, Noboru ages. How can the love of two young people, torn apart by war, survive? To what distance would you go...for your one, true love?"
Oh and you may need to watch it full screen (actually on Youtube.com) as occasionally the subtitles can get blurry.
Part 1 running time 9mins 22secs
Part 2 running time 9mins 5secs
Part 3 running time 6mins 34secs
Monday, July 17, 2006
I read this and figured it was wrong
So there I was reading an article the other day when I finally decided that Paris Hilton might be the worst celebrity of all time.
There is so much to dislike about her but I kind of already knew that - this article just pushed me over the edge. It had become quite apparent to me that Miss Hilton thinks she is excellent and has (in her own words) "suffered enough through life" and can "finally allow herself" to be happy. She sells herself as some kind of "brand" but it's just stuff man - where's the substance? She thinks she'll be remembered forever but she hasn't earned the right for legendary status. Also I've watched her try to manipulate people on Tv and she sucks at it.
On the plus side she dated Edward Furlong who is an absolute hero because he played the young John Connor who led the human resistance in Terminator 2. Then when Terminator 3 was in production and he was old enough to carry on the role from whence he left off, he wasn't used because he was a "mad bad boy drug addict" - awesome stuff a genuine role model.
In the words of Leopold "Butters" Scotch "Well you are kinda pretty Miss Hilton even if you do have a big nose."
Then after reading this annoying article I went on to read something equally as annoying entitled - The Top Ten Golden rules of Myspace - the following contains the authors rules and my interpretation of why they are factually incorrect.
1) It's about quantity not quality - Wrong - If you're trying to impress people on Myspace it's a lot better to have 100,000 friends instead of 1 obviously. Also no one is going to sift 100,000 people in great detail.
2) Never request a Myspace Cliche as your friend - Wrong - Request anyone you like don't be different for the sake of it that's just stupid.
3) If you're not going to do this properly don't do it at all - A big lie - I only use my Myspace profile for fishing and not for showing off - that is what the blog is for.
4) Think long and hard before filling in your profile and update is regularly - Lies - Honestly no one cares that much about your Myspace, update it when you are bored this keeps things varied.
5) Be careful with friends requests you don't know - an untruth - You could be careful or you could go crazy and mix things up a bit.
6) Live the Myspace lifestyle - Yer see everything in black and white, pull stupid poses and make sure you only appear at certain angles.
7) Use Myspace as a dating tool if you like, but only after the fact - that's not even a sentence - idiots - I assume the author means only use Myspace on a person after you've started dating. Please ignore this, search anyone you want on Myspace Tom designed it with stalking in mind.
8) Never use ironic music in your profile - No - ALWAYS use ironic music it reminds people of the classics missing from their collection.
9) Be careful not to offend actual best friends - Don't rotate your top eight. If they're your real friends they will understand why your top eight is filled with porn stars and trashy models.
10) Keep your friends international - Look it's harder to communicate with international people (you are less likely to have things in common) so by communicating nationally you're not stifling your creativity.
And finally to close I'll point out that Facebook is cooler than Myspace simply because of its elitest entry system which only allows you to be a member if you attend a certain university (you have to use a specific university e-mail address).
There is so much to dislike about her but I kind of already knew that - this article just pushed me over the edge. It had become quite apparent to me that Miss Hilton thinks she is excellent and has (in her own words) "suffered enough through life" and can "finally allow herself" to be happy. She sells herself as some kind of "brand" but it's just stuff man - where's the substance? She thinks she'll be remembered forever but she hasn't earned the right for legendary status. Also I've watched her try to manipulate people on Tv and she sucks at it.
On the plus side she dated Edward Furlong who is an absolute hero because he played the young John Connor who led the human resistance in Terminator 2. Then when Terminator 3 was in production and he was old enough to carry on the role from whence he left off, he wasn't used because he was a "mad bad boy drug addict" - awesome stuff a genuine role model.
In the words of Leopold "Butters" Scotch "Well you are kinda pretty Miss Hilton even if you do have a big nose."
Then after reading this annoying article I went on to read something equally as annoying entitled - The Top Ten Golden rules of Myspace - the following contains the authors rules and my interpretation of why they are factually incorrect.
1) It's about quantity not quality - Wrong - If you're trying to impress people on Myspace it's a lot better to have 100,000 friends instead of 1 obviously. Also no one is going to sift 100,000 people in great detail.
2) Never request a Myspace Cliche as your friend - Wrong - Request anyone you like don't be different for the sake of it that's just stupid.
3) If you're not going to do this properly don't do it at all - A big lie - I only use my Myspace profile for fishing and not for showing off - that is what the blog is for.
4) Think long and hard before filling in your profile and update is regularly - Lies - Honestly no one cares that much about your Myspace, update it when you are bored this keeps things varied.
5) Be careful with friends requests you don't know - an untruth - You could be careful or you could go crazy and mix things up a bit.
6) Live the Myspace lifestyle - Yer see everything in black and white, pull stupid poses and make sure you only appear at certain angles.
7) Use Myspace as a dating tool if you like, but only after the fact - that's not even a sentence - idiots - I assume the author means only use Myspace on a person after you've started dating. Please ignore this, search anyone you want on Myspace Tom designed it with stalking in mind.
8) Never use ironic music in your profile - No - ALWAYS use ironic music it reminds people of the classics missing from their collection.
9) Be careful not to offend actual best friends - Don't rotate your top eight. If they're your real friends they will understand why your top eight is filled with porn stars and trashy models.
10) Keep your friends international - Look it's harder to communicate with international people (you are less likely to have things in common) so by communicating nationally you're not stifling your creativity.
And finally to close I'll point out that Facebook is cooler than Myspace simply because of its elitest entry system which only allows you to be a member if you attend a certain university (you have to use a specific university e-mail address).
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